Porchester what?

If you were to get in the back of a cab and ask for Porchester in W2, you would be faced with the following options: Porchester Court, Gardens, Gardens M (?!), Gate, Place, Road, Square, Square M, Terrace, Terrace North and Walk. Your Leinster options aren’t much better and your Belsize options in NW3 are even worse. When attending appearances you will be marked down for calling these wrong.

I have now used every fixed river crossing from Chiswick Bridge in the west to the Blackwall Tunnel in the east. It seems quite amazing that I did not use Westminster Bridge on any run until Run 174 in BB3 and then used it again in Run 177. I’m 2 days behind schedule on my 16 runs per week, but after getting a load of stuff out of the way, I hope to forge ahead of this.

I’m now looking for another job in earnest. I probably need to practice my interview technique somewhat – one of the last interviews I had (6 years ago) I was asked if I could multitask and in a bid to impress I told the guy that I could do the Sun crossword and have a dump at the same time.  Remarkably, I didn’t get the job.

I have updated my CV and fired it off everywhere. While you can’t lie about your qualifications or the places you have worked, your profile at the start allows you to “enhance” your worth. Here’s how mine reads:

 

My Profile

A Senior Systems Engineer, I have 20 years experience working with some of the biggest names in the financial world. I have a methodical and conscientious approach and perform the most mundane tasks with a smile on my face.  I have travelled extensively around Europe in both a support and project capacity, and have received awards for my efforts in this.

………..and the TRUTH

This workshy halfwit has managed to blag a 20 year career in IT with some companies who really should know better. His work ethic is one of doing the absolute minimum to avoid getting the sack with most of his energy being expended on acting the clown. He once spent the day at a warehouse in Croydon unpacking some boxes, and because he kept the whinging to a minimum, his manger bought him a pint and a bag of pork scratchings.

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